The Every Fairy

Slutterbell: The Every Fairy

A fairy good podcast.

Sandy Whorehol

Tag: cats

TSAF – ep04 – WTF, Children. WTAF.

TSAF – ep04 – WTF, Children. WTAF.

I’ve been noticing that the mini-humans are sometimes smarter than the big ones (well, they make more sense, anyway) so we interviewed two of them in an attempt to gain a better understanding of who humans truly are, why they do the things they do, and what they’re teaching their children.

wtf children, humans are weird

Unfortunately, we walked away feeling more confused than we did when we arrived. I’m not sure what it is exactly that we learned during the whole ordeal, but I do know this:

A.) kids do not like Donald Trump

2.) the younger they are, the more they hate him

D.) kids really do say the darnedest things – especially when they’re talking to fairies, and especially when they’re talking to S.B. and me, and especially when their names are Platform 9 & 3/Alex and O’Charlie.

wtf children, humans are weird

In this episode, the four of us discuss:

  • fractions
  • Harry Potter
  • hashtag + pound = McDonald’s breakfast
  • Donald Trump’s intelligence
  • intelligence in general
  • what the child things would do if they were POTUS
  • bringing Obamacare back (at the request of the 9 year old)
  • fox sounds
  • bat sounds
  • legendary Pokémon who screech
  • puberty
  • where your anus is
  • leprechauns
  • dry shampoo
  • having a bad day
  • playing adult games
  • Camelot
  • explosive diarrhea
  • Xavier’s men
  • what parents say to their kids the most
  • kids saying “bad words”
  • Vines
  • knock-knock jokes
  • goat sex

…and for our segment, we play “What’s on My Butt?”

 

TSAF – ep02 – Hillary Skank and LeVar Burton and the Rainbow and the Butterfly

TSAF – ep02 – Hillary Skank and LeVar Burton and the Rainbow and the Butterfly

I found a fairy who’s been in the human world for 10 years now, and her name is Hillary Skank.

She stopped by “the studio” (my bedroom) to be our very first in-house guest and share her wisdom with us.

That wisdom, as it turns out, is limited entirely to cats and Star Trek: The Next Generation.

And how tf do you pass on an interview with that?

Therefore, in this episode, we did discuss the following subjects, which are listed in a sort-of-halfway-non-particular order:

  • loving cats
  • hating cats
  • cats are dicks
  • no they’re not
  • yes they are
  • and btw yes they are
  • humans worshipping false gods (cats)
  • trans species/species fluidity
  • being eaten by your pets when you die
  • how clean cat/dog mouths actually are
  • cats putting their asses in your face
  • “pungent scent glands”
  • my (Sandy’s) fairy sweat
  • my good-smelling shoulder
  • me becoming a perfume
  • sweat studies and collections
  • Star Trek TNG (also the Enterprise, Voyager, and Deep Space Nine)
  • comparing and assigning each of the characters from Star Trek TNG to specific cat breeds
  • Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Commander William Riker, Data the Robot Android (but not like the phone), Counselor Deanna Troi, Lieutenant Worf, Dr. Beverly Crusher, Wesley Crusher, Geordi LaForge, and Tasha Yar
  • sphynx cats,Siamese cats, Himalayan cats, calico cats, Maine coon cats, Cornish rex cats, orange tabby cats, cat roadkill, and Russian blue cats
  • grey vs blue
  • Shower Thoughts: cats edition
  • thanks be to reddit
  • cats and grammar correction
  • what cats do when you’re gone
  • Dogs vs cats
  • are Catholics actually addicted to cats
  • cat birth control
  • bird/dinosaur hunters
  • vibrating cats
  • Beethoven (both of them)
  • butterfly wing repair
  • Reading Rainbow
  • goat sex

Will Hillary Skank choose goat sex over having a bad reputation? Find out on episode 02 of There’s Something About Fairy. {Read this again in the voice of that one dude who does announcer and/or movie trailer voices [if you weren’t already (Also, why weren’t you??)].}

In the meantime, we’ve added some Star Trek TNG character/cat comparison photos to our website for your viewing pleasure. Engage.

And one more for the road:

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